No Spanx Violations in 2009

* Pulling out Bullhorn*  Just like friends don’t let friends drive drunk, friends don’t let friends commit Spanx violations. 

I tried to give out some advice about Spanx in a previous post.  But it is blatently obvious my words have gone unheeded.  Millions of women came out in support of  Obamapaloooza in D.C.  and as I strolled the streets, and reviewed online photo albums, I realized Spanx etiquette is a lesson worth revisiting. 

Spanx are light-weight, won’t cut off circulation, and are the best thing since sliced bread.  Everyone from a size 0-28 NEEDS some support in certain outfits.  Why not put your best foot forward and keep America beautiful?  I’m just sayin……..

Ladies let me give you a few blunt tips and tricks

1.  Spanx are not for pouring yourself into an outfit 2 sizes too small- Spanx and undergarments are not your Hail Mary pass.  Spanx are designed to slim bulges, tone down fat rolls, and firm up your jiggly parts.  They may even make you a size smaller. …that’s it.  That dress might be calling you but that doesn’t mean you need to answer. 

2  Be a friend, tell her that dress looks awful and is a hot mess- In this age of the Internet you aren’t just caught slippin in your own town, your violations become international through picture forwarding.  I know we are all sensitive about our weight and how we look.  But, you are doing your friend no favors by lying and saying “Girl, you look awesome.”  You know daggone well she has fat pouring out in inappropriate places, the dress is too short, or at some point her Facebook photo will end up on HotGhettoMess.com.  Ladies please, man up, take off the gloves and slap her with the truth. 

3. Spanx are supposed to be  a secret- No one is supposed to know you have them on.  If you find them sneaking out on you, put your girls on Spanx alert and have them let you know your ish is hanging out.  Lets vow not to have Spanx show up in any more Myspace, or Facebook albums thanks.

4.  Bring your Spanx to the dressing room – So you found that cute dress and are wondering if you can get it a size smaller, or if that pesky midsection problem will rear its evil head.  Do everyone a favor and try on the entire outfit at the dressing room.  That way, you will have no suprises the day of.  You can purchase and know ahead of time that you will look fabulous.

Here are a few visual aides and guides to help you in your journey.

Hide and Sleek Thong Panty

Got thin material and worried about panty lines? -Comfortable, lace thong with high-waisted control. Gentle double-layer compression starts just under the bra line and extends down, creating a firm tummy & smooth midriff.  Soft, brushed elastic waistband in back maximizes comfort, while providing a stay-put fit. Surged edges around the legs eliminate pinching and binding.  With no front waistband or center seam, panty is hidden under the lightest of fabrics.

 

Smooth Back Fat

Bye Bye Back Fat –  Naturally adjusting shoulder and back straps, made from a unique hosiery fabric that automatically conforms to your body like a second skin, banishing VBL (Visible Bra Lines) and minimizing back fat. Front-closure design eliminates uncomfortable metal hooks and clasps in back. Smooth, foam-lined cups provide uplifting support and coverage. So, say good-bye to BBS (Bad Bra Syndrome)!

 

Cant afford Spanx?

1. Try Assets from Target ( same brand cheaper quality)  does the same job. 

2. Hit up Ebay – the items are not worn  and you can get them for a fraction of the cost.

 

 

Any questions???

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